(Written a week ago) Hello, family/friends. I hope everyone is happy and well. I have been PRETTY GOOD, for the most part except for a few things. First, I should be frank in telling you all that I have had to resort to turning underwear inside out. I have done it for the past couple of days, and I don’t regret it one bit. True, I was smelly, but I was the sweetest smelly person ever. I know that seems contradictory to all you simple minded folk, but I am using sweet in place of “cool.” (For the simplest minded who thought that it made perfect sense, well, you are S.O.L.). Anyways, the second thing that has been bugging me, lately, is my chi is off balance. It’s been pretty frustrating because I keep doing stupid things, and small inconveniences keep throwing me off. For example, I cut my finger on a can of tuna, got lost, tripped over a door frame, smashed my toe under a bed, hurt my middle finger trying to open a Sprite, jammed my pinky finger, went 5/30 from the field in basketball, and lost a bet. Normally, I don’t do these mortal maneuvers, but they have been happening one after the other. What is more, most of these have happened in the last few days. The third episode that has been bothering me is my apartment. I finally moved into my apartment this past weekend. It’s the worst one of all the apartments I have seen, and I can’t do much about it. It’s small and it’s dirty to say the least. Despite the fact that cleaners came to clean the apartment (and they did a decent job), there was filth that was harder to get unless furniture was moved. What I am trying to say is that the lady before me had a cat. I could not believe how disgusting cats really are/were (?), and I am soooo glad the lady and her stupid cat are gone, out of the country, thousands of miles from me. There was cat hair, cat nip, and cat litter everywhere, and I only discovered this grunge when I moved around furniture. When I would move something, there would just be huge piles of hair, etc. At one point, I was so frustrated at the condition of my apartment, and I literally wanted to punch someone in the face. Nonetheless, after hours and hours of sweeping, wanting to vomit, and wishing bad things on a certain animal and/or lady, most of the hair is gone and I am mostly situated. I still need to do a few finishing touches, but I am very close to being comfortable in my new place. I think that what I have said is most all of my grievances.
As for the good things that have happened to me lately:
- I found a dime on the floor.
- I have TOO many chairs in my apartment. Yeah, that’s right, I have 3! In fact, I have so many and of different variations that I could do really cool and different activities in all of them. On one chair, I can spin around for hours if I please. On another, I can lounge and relax. In fact, I napped in the chair yesterday, and it was amazing. And in the third chair, I can sit properly. I can sit so proper that you may mistake me as being someone who is both classy and well-mannered with a slight hint of precociousness.
- I got a drying rack for free from a former English teacher. You heard me (or … read my words) correctly, a drying rack. Other notable objects received from this particular lad: free plants (one bamboo and another… leafy plant with leaves, speakers (for the good ‘ole laptop), a hammer, and a screw driver… and ONE roll of extra plush toilet paper that is soft and gentle on the bum.
- I lost weight, and my butt became less cellulittical (mostly from a lack of eating, not from living a healthy/active lifestyle). (Note: No, cellulittical is not a real word). (Note 2: Yes, I did and do have cellulite on my butt, just like Kim Kardashian. Like Kim, I am also proud of my body and happy that Armenian women/Chinese men have abnormally large aces).
- Lastly, my washer machine is ALSO a dryer.
Okay, so it’s nearly bedtime now. To end this update, I am going to tell you all what I have been doing. Actually, I just realized that I forgot to tell you all about how Kris’ situation has affected my situation. Like I have said before, his lack of intelligence is the sole reason why the swine flu has hit . Some think that the swine originated from pigs, but we all know who the real pig is. Regardless, H1N1 is in Asia, and CDI (the program Kris works for, which is 50+ schools large) closed down every single school. Subsequently, many Korean parents of kids who attend (my school) have been worried about the outbreak possibly being passed on in the school. As a result, I am also in quarantine. My quarantine is different, though, because we don’t actually have anyone with the swine. In fact, my quarantine is much better. I have to check in everyday at , and I have to stay there for 1-2 hours. Then, I get to leave, and I get to do whatever I want. I have been to three times in the last 5 days, and I have been seeing many neat areas. My favorite, so far, is Insadong in , and it is both artsy and traditional. Mostly, I like it because I was able to buy a bow and arrows. (haha, I almost typed, “boy and arrows”… NOT a Freudian slip). Anyways, the arrows have the sticky suction cups at the end. I can’t wait to bring them into work and shoot my co-workers/kids. Ah, I digress… This next week will be similar to Thursday and Friday of last week when the period of quarantine began. So, I can’t WAIT for work this week. J Hopefully, I can get into a few more times. And, that is what I have been up to. I’m incredibly tired now. I’m off to bed. Good Morning (because it’s currently )! But seriously, have a nice Sunday.
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